If Popular Websites Wrote About Ultimate

by | April 1, 2014, 2:24pm 0

In honor of April Fools Day, Skyd presents a look at the state of modern online media by anonymous contributor J. M. Goofowitz:


  • 1 Other Use For A Frisbee And 19 Other Uses For A Plate
  • Which Muffin Hairstyle Are You?

Slate & Salon

  • The Colonialist Paradigm Of Ro-sham-bo
  • Grand-Masters: When Did Ageism Become Acceptable?
  • Junior Worlds & the Fetishization of Young Athletes

AOL Homepage

  • See “S*&T Ultimate Players Say,” “Keyboard Cat,” “Double Rainbow” And The Rest Of America’s Newest “Memes”


  • This Disc Looked Out Of A Sockeye Player’s Reach. You Won’t Believe What Happened Next!
  • Watch What Happens When A Hodag Utters Three Simple Words After A Foul-Contest.


  • w4m: NSA Pick-Up Gamer 4 Same
  • Missed connection: You were wearing a sequin dress and bandana while yelling at a volunteer observer for poor spirit. I was girl crossing the Quad trying to get to class. You also screamed to me, “Hey c’mon, don’t walk through the endzone.”


  • Vintage, Crocheted Disc With Antique Owl Design And Cold-Kilned Mug Of Hand-Poured V8 Splash. $85.00 USD.


  • Jock Looking 2 Toss

Perez Hilton

  • Friction Gloves: Who Wore It Better?


  • The MLU Is The Worst, Also Wall Street Is The Worst, And Yeah, Smarm, We Hate That Too. Ugh, Seth McFarlane.


  • USA Ultimate Changes Open Division to Men’s Division. Not Cool, Guys.


  • “Hey cutie, wanna huck?”

The Atlantic

  • Why I’m Quitting Ultimate

 The Onion

  • Florida: Decade in Review With Casey Anthony, George Zimmerman, and Brodie Smith


  • 6 Things You Didn’t Know About The 2004 College National Championship


  • TIL beau travelled in the mamabird video

 Fox News

  • Crawford reveals USAU Budget Proposal, Spending Hurts Wives and Daughters of Military


  • USAU Stifles Free-Market Pro-Ulti with Triple Crown Tournament Dates




  • Frisbee Catch. This is a clip of a guy catching a frisbee.


  • Hot Crazy Moves to Spread Nutella on His Bagel


  • Efficacy Model of Voice Value: Formulating the “Expected Vocal Contribution” Algorithm And Ranking the 2014 NexGen Announcers

The New Yorker

  • The Ultimate Choice
  • [Daily Cartoon of a pig returning a Pulsar to a “Complaints” window]

Mother Jones

  • Ultimate’s effect on the microecologies of Wales

Skyd Magazine

  • Windmill Wind-Up 2015 Inside Scoop: Can Holland’s Saladboys Defeat Japan’s 4th Grade Team Sausagefingers — Part 6

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